Emotional Detachment For a Better Life

Emotional Detachment For a Better Life

By Remez Sasson
 Do you take everything too personally?
Do your moods go up and down often?
Can an insignificant incident destroy your whole day?
Are you easily affected by what people say or think about you?
Do you allow situations and people to affect your moods and your behavior?
Do you lack inner peace?
The good news is that some degree of emotional detachment can help you change this situation!
Emotional detachment is useful at home and at work, in your relationships with your family, relatives, friends and co-workers, and with everyone else.

Imagine how free, relieved and happy you would be, if you could stay calm and poised in the midst of whatever is happening in your life. Think how much physical, emotional, and mental energy you could spare, if you could avoid becoming upset, angry or moody.

Lack of emotional detachment leads to attachment, to fear of letting go, and to avoiding changes. You need some degree of emotional detachment, if you wish to feel free, and to improve the quality of your life. Otherwise, people and events, your memories, thoughts, and past, will tie you down.

Emotional agitation, anger, and hurt feelings, cause stress and unhappiness, and lead nowhere, except to more pain, suffering, and broken relationships. They disturb your mind, disrupt your concentration, and prevent you from focusing on the matters at hand. If you wish to enjoy inner peace, it is imperative that you try to gain at least some degree of emotional detachment.

Too much emotional involvement with matters that do not concern you, or are not important, take too much of your time, energy and health. Excessive emotional involvement agitates your mind and feelings, and obstructs inner peace, common sense, and right judgement.

Emotional detachment would not necessarily make your life problems-free. You will still encounter disturbing circumstances and disturbing people, because this is part of life, however, your attitude toward them, your state of mind, and the way you react, would change.

Detachment, as taught in this book, does not make you want to avoid meeting people or experiencing feelings. You can interact with other people, show warmth, compassion and love, and yet, maintain a state of equanimity, calmness, and inner strength.
  • Emotional detachment produces a state of inner peace and equanimity, which is unaffected by external circumstances, nor by people’s moods or states of mind.
  • Emotional detachment is essential for every person who wishes to become free from worries, fears and anxiety.
  • A state of emotional detachment is most useful in many situations, when dealing with family or friends, or at your job.
  • True detachment is an inner attitude, which allows you to interact with other people, show warmth, compassion and love, and yet, maintain a state of composure and equanimity.
  • Emotional detachment can help you maintain a state of calmness, self-control and psychic integrity, when handling your daily affairs of life and in your interactions with people.
  • Learn how to avoid dwelling on distressing or unpleasant events from your past, and reliving them in your mind over and again.
  • Learn how to avoid becoming agitated by what people say or do, and by circumstances and events.
  • Find out how to remain calm and unaffected in the company of people, who burden you with their worries and problems, or hurt your feelings.
  • Discover how to remain calm and balanced, and use judgement and common sense in pressing and difficult situations.

Emotional detachment is a skill, which you can learn like any other skill, and is vital for every person, everywhere, and in all walks of life. It is the antidote to constant thinking about the past, worrying about the future, dwelling on what this or that person said, and taking everything too personally.

Emotional detachment, as taught in this book, has nothing to do with avoiding people or feelings. It is an inner attitude, which enables you to maintain a state of composure and equanimity, and at the same time interact with other people, show warmth, compassion and love.

Well-developed emotional detachment produces a state of inner peace and equanimity, undisturbed by circumstances or other people’s moods and states of mind, just like a calm lake that is undisturbed by winds or waves.
  • One of the important characteristics of emotional detachment is the ability to avoid getting involved with unnecessary or unhealthy emotions and reactions.
  • It helps you avoid becoming upset by what people say or do, or by their emotions, reactions or behavior.
  • Emotional detachment protects you from being upset by external conditions or situations. It does not necessarily change your circumstances, but it allows you to act and react calmly and with common sense, without emotional agitation, which often clouds the judgement and wastes unnecessary emotional and physical energy.
  • With this ability, you can keep away thoughts about distressing or unpleasant events from your past, and avoid reliving them in your mind over and again. This ability will also help you stay away from worries about current problems, and from worries about the future.
  • Emotional detachment can be applied in your relationships with strangers, and also in your relationships with people you know, with family, relatives, co-workers or friends, and with anyone else. It protects you from being manipulated, disturbed, or hurt by emotionally demanding, manipulative or negative people.
  • A state of emotional detachment is most useful in many situations, such as when a driver behind you keeps honking, even when you cannot drive faster or let him pass. It is useful when dealing with family or friends, who try to manipulate you through guilty conscience, making you do things that you don’t want to do. It also helps you stay calm and unaffected, when in the company of people, who intentionally or unintentionally burden you with their worries and problems, or hurt your feelings.
  • This skill can also help you at your job. If your boss, colleagues or customers demand too much of you, or are harsh on you, you will be able to remain calm, undisturbed and fearless.

This book was written in the form of a conversation between a teacher and a pupil, which made it possible to ask questions the reader might ask, and answer them in a simple and easy to understand language. This format makes it possible to clarify, guide and instruct the subject in a more personal way, as if the reader is actually in the presence of a teacher.

Remez Sasson, the author of the book, teaches and writes about self-improvement, positive thinking, inner peace, spiritual growth and meditation.
He has been studying and practicing these subjects for many years, and therefore, speaks and writes from personal experience. You can read many of his articles at this website and at many other websites.
Remez Sasson is also the author of the books “Peace of Mind in Daily Life”, “Willpower and Self Discipline”, “Visualize and Achieve” and “Affirmations – Words with Power”, all available at this website.

True detachment brings into one’s life inner strength, self-discipline, open-mindedness, common sense, better comprehension, and the ability to see the pros and cons of every situation. It also guards you from being adversely affected by the moods, and negative thoughts and emotions of other people.

Adopting a detached attitude enables you to exercise your best judgement, handle efficiently every situation, and become a tower of strength for others in times of need and difficulties.

By refusing to open yourself to emotional turmoil that does not concern you, you protect your physical, emotional and mental being from becoming drained out and from exhaustion.

Hi Remez,

I just finished reading “Emotional Detachment for a Better Life.” I plan on reading it again soon. A friend of mine suggested that I read it.

I felt compelled to reach out to you, since what I learned is so powerful. I’ll be 45 next month. It seems all my life, up until this present moment, I’ve been trying to fix what I have broken. I’ve made some bad decisions, and I’m paying dearly for the consequences of my actions from my younger years. Your book really gave me a new outlook on how to deal with things, and I look forward to gaining better emotional health, and to be comfortable with myself and my relations with others.

Before I read your book, I felt like I was doomed with no hope or chance for inner peace, and because you were here on this Earth and wrote this book, and my friend turned me on to it, I am forever grateful. I want to thank you personally for saving my life and giving me hope again.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

Michael DiVito

Leave a Reply