Maintaining A Loving Marriage!


Love and passion are the name of the game at the beginning of a marriage.  Keeping the love and the romance are important.  There are a few love concepts that I suggest.  Love wants the good of the other, first; self second.  Everyone has conflict.  If there is no conflict between two people they are probably not growing or taking risks in life that make life stimulating and worth living.  Conflict and fighting is not the same thing.   Conflict is disagreeing about something.  Resolving conflict takes problem solving strategies for resolution.  When people fight it is usually a power struggle not a conflict.  Conflict is a difference of opinion or belief.   Sometimes conflict is someone engaging in poor or illegal behavior. 

 When communicating with a spouse when your style has been to argue or disagree it’s time to ask ourselves a question.

 Before saying or doing anything we should ask ourselves—“Is this a loving act.”  If what you were about to say or do does not pass the “Is this a loving act.” test then you should stop and rethink what you are doing.  

 Romance is important always in a marriage.  In the early years this may come easily.  As children come and the stresses of jobs, finances and life in general, interfere with making an effort to keep the romance going, individuals may begin to have more conflict or lose some of the passion.  Couples need to work on romance.  Couple time is important.  Doing activities that are fun and engaging is important.  Affection and taking care of each other are important. 

 Sending flowers, having a candle light dinner, going out on a date with each other, back rubs, foot rubs, helping with difficult chores are just a few ideas.  Begin and end the day with hugs and kisses.  Remember your beloved’s favorite drinks or foods.  Have a favorite song.  Make couple friends.  Have family time but also have couple time.

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